THE VAULT (ITV) Melanie Sykes: What is the name given to the condition where the sufferer can fall asleep at any time? Contestant: Nostalgia.
STEVE WRIGHT IN THE AFTERNOON (RADIO 2) Wright: Johnny Weissmuller died on this day. Which jungle-swinging character clad only in a loincloth did he play? Contestant: Jesus
NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1) Eamonn Holmes: Dizzy Gillespie is famous for playing what? Contestant: Basketball.
DOG EAT DOG (BBC1) Ulrika Jonsson: Who wrote Lord Of The Rings? Contestant: Enid Blyton.
NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1) Eamonn Holmes: There are three states of matter: solid, liquid and . . ? Contestant: Jelly.
FORT BOYARD (CHALLENGE TV) Jodie Penfold: Arrange these two groups of letters to form a word - CHED and PIT. Team: Chedpit.
SIMPLY THE BEST (ITV) Phil Tufnell: How many Olympic Games have been held? Contestant: Six. Tufnell: Higher! Contestant: Five.
NOTTS AND CROSSES QUIZ (BBC RADIO NOTTINGHAM) Jeff Owen: In which country is Mount Everest? Contestant (long pause): Er, it's not in Scotland, is it?
THE WEAKEST LINK (BBC2) Anne Robinson: In traffic, what 'j' is where two roads meet? Contestant: Jool carriageway?
QUIZMANIA (ITV) Greg Scott: We're looking for an occupation beginning with T. Contestant: Doctor. Scott: No, it's 'T'. 'T' for Tommy. 'T' for Tango. Contestant: Oh, (pause) Doctor.
BIG QUIZ (LBC) Gary King: Name the funny men who once entertained kings and queens at court. Contestant: Lepers.
DANNY KELLY SHOW (RADIO WM) Kelly: Which French Mediterranean town hosts a famous film festival every year? Contestant: I need a clue. Kelly: OK. What do beans come in? Contestant: Cartons?
TALKSPORT Andy Townsend: How many wheels does a tricycle have? Caller: Two. Townsend: The Beatles were known as the Fab...? Caller: Five.
MAGIC 52 (NORTH-EAST ENGLAND) Presenter: In what year was President Kennedy assassinated? Contestant: Erm... Presenter: Well, let's put it this way - he didn't see 1964. Contestant: 1965?
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Somedays we are the windscreens,Somedays wer're the flies...
