Last week i started building the inner thermalite block wall of my fishpond. While tapping down one of the blocks i walloped my index finger and broke it. It went extremely purple, swelled up twice the size and after a day or so, the nail came off. The finger has returned to normal size now but its looking extremely chewed up. Yesterday i was laying the outer wall. This time the blocks were solid concrete and weigh a ton. So you can imagine the kind of force you have to hit them to get them level. (Im obviously no bricklayer) I got all the way round and had about eight left to lay. THWACK...middle finger is now huge, purple and broken. Just waiting for the bloody nail to go now....fer fk sake...... So i now have two knackered fingers on one hand. Oh, and one thumb. Didnt want to mention this but i may as well now im this far. Last april i cut my left thumb off with a handsaw. It was left hanging on by a piece of skin and a small bit of tissue. After surgery to repair the tendon etc, i was put in a cast and sent home after a couple of days. Sat at home bored and decided to carry on with the shed i was building. I sliced the tip of the same thumb off from the knuckle. This time on a table saw with a 10" blade. The surgeon couldnt believe it when i walked in with the thumb still in a cast with the tip hanging off. My left hand and i dont always see eye to eye....
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FECK
I am the willing Led by the unknowing Doing the impossibe For the ungrateful.
Its strange aint it???? Ive been doing diy for years and years but just lately its all gone a bit heath robinson for some reason. I done a few tattoos today, even with me broken fingers. Didnt find it a problem at all cos im right handed. Just seem to have had a run of bad luck. (or my brains on holiday).
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FECK
I am the willing Led by the unknowing Doing the impossibe For the ungrateful.
in 2000 i bought this caravan, it was parked at my sisters when i was'nt useing it. one week end it was my nephews birthday plenty of booz ect. so we decided to stay in the van for the night, showing family around it as it was new to us, aparently my brother inlaw was fidling with the knobs on the cooker to see how it works. after a while my daughter could smell gas so i went in to investigate. got me lighter out to see which ring was turned on, couldn't find it so i tried the grill booooooooooooom i was thrown to the other end of the van. lost me eye brows took the skin off my nose the van survived. still got the van aint been near the cooker sinse.
mitch has some good stories as well. like the night he punched me as hard as he could in the nuts while i was driving....we nearly went through a shop!!
or
the time he draged me down the road at 30mph with sparks coming off me steelies!!
I tried that in the snow. When a mate owned an old sooty style pick up (rascal or summat) he towed me around the nacton industrial estate. I was holding on the back with a pair of dr martens on. We reached a little over 20mph but the van was slithering around so badly we couldnt go any harder. The roads were solid ice that year, i think i was 18 at the time. Jesus....nearly 21 years ago...... Never forget it tho.
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FECK
I am the willing Led by the unknowing Doing the impossibe For the ungrateful.
i cannot believe there are more of you out there , just thought i had the one who ball's things up...but all is now forgiven si , think its a man thing...hahaha love the story's....
Theres plenty more where they came from i can tell ya Like the times me and me mates used to pinch all the traffic cones and road signs and closed off the orwell bridge...big hold ups and mass confusion for a few minutes until the old bill showed up I used to go see a couple of mates of mine quite late at night. They lived in a small dead end street and you could never park in there. Their neighbour, 2 doors down, used to work 10pm - 6am and i knew if i got there at ten to ten on the dot he would be leaving for work and id drop straight into his parking space. It was a perfect plan...until one night his missus came out and told me i was taking the pi*s and she was sick and tired of me parking there. (there were no front gardens, the front door opened onto the pathway) I was civil at first and pointed out that if i didnt park there someone else would so whats the problem etc...then it got a bit heated and i told her my car was mot'd taxed and insured and i can park anywhere i fkn well like. Anyway...a few weeks later it was new years eve. 1998 if i remember rightly. My mates and i had been down the pub for a couple of shandy's, and we were all a bit worse for wear. On the way back to their place i could hear a big party going on at the offending neighbours house. So i took a dump right outside their doorstep Me??? hold a grudge??? never... I flopped on my mates sofa and within a few minutes i could hear "c'mon and do the conga...." etc. The party spilled out onto the street and back into the house. Id hate to have seen her carpet in the morning.......
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FECK
I am the willing Led by the unknowing Doing the impossibe For the ungrateful.
Many years ago one christmas, i was round a girlfriends house and id had a malibu or twelve. We were messing around and having a right laugh while her family were on a night out. I found a recorder in one of the cupboards while i was looking for some more bevvies and thought "hmmm i need to fart" so i pulled me kaks down, put the mouthpiece to me ringpiece (fnaarrr) and let rip. We cracked up cos the sound was a "twweeeet" with a "brraaatttcchhh" at the same time. Forgot all about it til after the new year. I went to see the girlfriend at 7pm as usual and she answered the door in fits of laughter. Her brother had found the recorder and said "i aint seen this old thing since school" and sat playing it.... The tears were rolling down my face......
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FECK
I am the willing Led by the unknowing Doing the impossibe For the ungrateful.
SOMEDAY SON ALL THIS WILL BE MINE!!
(there were no front gardens, the front door opened onto the pathway)
Me??? hold a grudge??? never...
