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parrot
(Preview)
a parrot swallows a viagra tablet. his owner disgusted put him in the freezer to cool off. later when he opened the freezer he found the parrot sweating. how come your sweating he asks. the parrot replied do you know how f**king hard it is to open the legs of a frozen chicken.
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dell
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0
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237
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jim and edna
(Preview)
jim and edna are mental patients. one day jim jumps in the pool and stays on the bottom. edna dives in and saves him. the director calls edna into his office and says "edna i've got some good news and some bad news, the good news is we're releasing you, as your obviously sane saving anothers life. but...
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dell
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0
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289
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Silly balloon joke
(Preview)
Three balloons. Daddy balloon, mummy balloon and baby balloon. Daddy balloon saids to baby balloon, look son, you are much to old to sleep with mummy and daddy, you will have to sleep in you're own bed. Baby balloon protests, I like sleeping with you and mummy. No you are not sleeping with us and thats fi...
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Tony2000
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0
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248
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I asked my wife to do it.
(Preview)
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stevie
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0
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244
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LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD
(Preview)
Little red riding hood walks into the bedroom and says"grandma what big eyes youve got". The wolf replies"and what large tits youve got get them out so i can have a play". Little red riding hood pulls down her nickers and says"**** off you can eat me just like in the book&quo...
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tailfin
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0
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303
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YUK
(Preview)
WHAT HAS TWO LEGS AND BLEEDS HALVE A DOG
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xtroortx
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0
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195
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Basil who?
(Preview)
two muslims walk in to a bar BOOM BOOM
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xtroortx
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0
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193
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IRISH SEX PROTECION
(Preview)
Why did the irishman put two condoms on To be sure to be sure
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xtroortx
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0
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234
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bad santa
(Preview)
A 10 year old girl goes into santas grotto and sits on his lap. santa say's, "hello little girl, what do you want for christmas?" the little girl replies "some of my older friends at school have got some hair between their legs and i would like some too" santa says " will a whit...
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chucky
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1
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267
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death
(Preview)
I was chopping up carrots with the Grim Reaper the other day. Yes, I was dicing with death!
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cadillacman
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0
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233
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i-Breast
(Preview)
Apple Computer announced today that it has developed a computer chip that can store and play music in women's breast implants. The iBreast will cost £499 to £599. This is considered to be a major breakthrough because women are always complaining about men staring at their breasts and not listenin...
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cadillacman
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0
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184
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Xmas prezzie
(Preview)
Pissed off with my wifes mood swings i bought her a mood ring for xmas last year. I soon learnt that when she was happy it had a blue colour to the stone. When she was pissed off it left a red mark to my forehead.
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stevie
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2
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280
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" Strange but true "
(Preview)
I was driving though Suffolk today when I noticed 2 signs First sign, You are entering a influenza flu controlled area Second sign, Local farmer come and buy a local free range turkey feck that Im having beef!!!
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cadillacman
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0
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235
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train set
(Preview)
why are womens breasts like a train set a kid gets at christmas? Because they were originally meant for children but dad wants to play with them.
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chucky
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0
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251
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banned telly ads
(Preview)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PRiYkwtBK34&feature=related...
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Chevy
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0
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239
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Us men do understand women....
(Preview)
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stevie
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4
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274
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8 things a woman should say to her bloke
(Preview)
1. i'm bored, lets shave my pussy 2. are you sure you've had enough to drink? 3. that fart was great, do another one 4. of course i swallow, i love the taste of cum 5. no thats alright, you drink all that beer and watch porno, i'll do the washing up 6. just for a change could you put it in my arse 7. how abo...
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chucky
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2
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274
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Chuck Norris Quotes love it!!!!
(Preview)
Some kids piss their name in the snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name into concrete.27148.356Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever the **** he wants.23358.347Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2n...
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cadillacman
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0
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236
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GANGSTER
(Preview)
THERE'S AN EVIL GANSTER STILL AT LARGE,GOES AROUND CREEPING UP BEHIND PEOPLE AND PULLING THEIR PANTS UP REALLY HARD-AND I MEAN RIGHT UP THEIR ARSE-CRACK:POLICE SAY THEY ARE STILL ON THE LOOK-OUT FOR "WEDGIE KRAY"...
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Hollywood
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0
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229
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THE HAT
(Preview)
Man is lying naked on a beach with a hat over his dick.An ugly woman walks by and says"if you were any kind of gentleman you would raise your hat".The man replies"if you were any kind of lady the hat would raise itself!!"
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tailfin
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0
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191
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Weird thing happened today
(Preview)
Today whilst driving I was over taken by a Chav in a Escort convertible, the hood was down, but bizarrely he had 7 magic tree air fresheners hanging from the interior mirror Am I missing something is the world that smelly?
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cadillacman
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0
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204
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SEX IN THE SHOWER
(Preview)
80% of black men said they enjoyed sex in the shower.20% said they hadn't been to prison yet!!!
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tailfin
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0
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227
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Criminals
(Preview)
Following the approval of Viagra by the UK's health authorities, the first shipment arrived on 19th May at Heathrow airport, but was hijacked on the way to the depot. Scotland Yard have warned the public to be on the lookout for a gang of hardened criminals.
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stevie
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0
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202
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perfume
(Preview)
A young and beautiful woman gets into the lift, smelling like expensive perfume. She turns to an old woman and says arrogantly, "Giorgio Beverly Hills, £100 an ounce!" Another young and beautiful woman gets on the lift and also smells of very expensive perfume. She arrogantly turns to t...
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stevie
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0
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216
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BRITAINS GOT TALENT
(Preview)
Just heard on the radio about a guy called Simon from Bury st Edmunds.Seems he had a bad car crash 3 months ago and lost both his legs.If that wasn't enough his uncle died a month later.The good news is a surgeon was able to stitch his dead uncles legs onto his stumps.He is now learning to walk and has starte...
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tailfin
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0
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218
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Yet another blonde joke
(Preview)
A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading...
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stevie
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0
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188
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BUG
(Preview)
I answered the door this morning and there stood a six foot beetle.He smacked me round the head and ran off.I just want to let every body know that there's a nasty bug going round!!
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tailfin
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1
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216
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Do pumpkins fart?
(Preview)
http://cliffschecter.bravenewfilms.org/blog/17537-happy-humpday-halloween
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stevie
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0
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213
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what ya got?
(Preview)
TRUE FACT: Male sperm (Y) swim faster and die sooner than female sperm (X), because female sperm contain heavier genetic material, which slows them down but allows them to live longer. THEREFORE: Males with longer penises tend to produce more male offspring because they deposit the sperm closer to...
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stevie
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4
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276
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LOL, this is a good one!
(Preview)
Reasons not to . . . A husband and wife were scheduled to attend a Halloween party. The wife got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the Halloween party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed and there was no need fo...
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evilged
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2
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222
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